Anatomy of a novel

Fair dinkum


I'm supposed to be polishing my final manuscript for Escape From Mad Bill's island, the funny crime caper I plan to release in the last half of May.

Forgive me for getting distracted though.

I'm chuffed because the first two reviews for Lie of the Tiger have come in on Goodreads, and both have five-star ratings.

Gotta love the high ratings (I'm growing a thick skin in readiness for the bad ones), but even more encouraging to me was that one of the reviews came from the United States 

Be careful crossing the road when you’re reading

I’M OLD enough to remember when phones only came attached to walls with cords — so I marvel that it’s now possible to read a novel on your smartphone.

Like anything, I wouldn’t recommend it if I hadn’t tried it.

My mind was opened when I listened to The Kindle Chronicles podcast a while back. I listen to a lot of podcasts about book marketing and writing craft. This one sometimes gets a bit technical for my little brain but there is considerable overlap of things that interest me. …

Good news for an Aussie eBook convert

"Print bookselling remains artificially silo’d by country even today, for variety of legacy historical and logistical reasons. But by contrast, the global ebook marketplace is a seamlessly international one.”

So begins Author Earnings' latest report entitled: 

February 2017 Big, Bad, Wide & International Report: covering Amazon, Apple, B&N, and Kobo ebook sales in the US, UK, Canada, Australia, and New Zealand

If you are a writer of ebooks or just interested in the publishing industry, you should read it for yourself 

Your FREE funny novel

Small-Apples Green

Join my mailing list to get a free e-book copy of the first novel in my funny Windy Mountain series. 

IN A NUTSHELL: The mayor of Windy Mountain thinks he can defy public opposition and rip out his historic orchard, but he hasn’t counted on the reaction of Tasmanian tiger hunter Moose Routley.  AUSTRALIAN HUMOUR WITH A FEW DASHES OF MYSTERY: 62,000 words.

I’m using a service called BookFunnel to deliver this book. The aim is to get it easily to people's devices. 

Funny you should ask

cropped-humor book

As a writer, I’ve always had a problem with being pinned down to a genre. As a reader though, genres make a lot of sense to me because they inform which shelf I need to peruse to find something that suits my mood.

So I'd better declare my hand.

I’m a humour writer. The problem now is working out where to shine the torch to find out which murky corner my work is lurking in.

This week I’m taking part in a global internet happening called #ComedyBookWeek.

Major BS rises again


Major BS is getting a makeover. My 2007 novel has a new title, some tweaking and tighter editing. It’s due to be released on August 23  but is now available for pre-order.

The new cover is displayed here. Feel free to tell me what you think of it

 The crux of the story is unchanged: what’s a bumbling Englishman with ideas above his station going to do with a bunch of  illegal immigrants he’s accidentally brought to Australia?

I know illegal immigration is no laughing matter. …

Here comes the sun

It’s traditional to make your New Year’s resolutions on New Year’s Eve, but I'm not much of a traditionalist.

I pledged to write my latest novel while watching the sun rising out of the Pacific on January 1 in 2014. We were on holidays in Bermagui on the NSW south coast, a short walk from the famed Blue Pool. 

At midnight, I was sound asleep. The previous New Year’s Eve I watched a spectacular fireworks display over the Venice basin. Apologies to Bermy, but I didn’t think they could match that.

Give me back my index


I have a good excuse for not having a searchable index for my upcoming ebook of columns,  Son, Give Me Back My Trousers. Well, someone to blame anyway.


As regular readers of this blog would know, I am in the middle of publishing some old work with Amazon KDP. My aim is to teach myself some of the ‘ins’ and ‘outs’ of formatting and marketing online. By the time I unleash my novels, I hope to have gathered some speed and expertise.

Son, Give Me Back My Trousers

Going for the full bottle


I have a confession to make. I wrote most of Jack and the Jellybean Stalk last century.

Many of the stories made it into various newspapers as columns — and they always garnered good feedback.

So I collated them into a collection which I submitted to a traditional publisher in 2002.  But the feedback I got this time was very different. I received a curt rejection notice along the lines of: 'No one is interested in stories about your son but you, you tosser.'

Short e-stories, tall tales


I’ve dipped my toe into e-publishing with the release of Romeo and Julie: a collection of funny short stories with Kindle.

Table of contents

.  Romeo and Julie
.  Living 
next door to Rembrandt
 . Curse of the Unhandyman
.  Moose on the Loose
.  Letter on Noah: we want our Tasmanian tigers back
.  Falling off the end of the newspaper world
.  One small step for man, one giant leap backwards for photo processing
.  Santa
s resignation letter

© John Martin